Tabitha Cato – The Case of the Roguish Ram

At first, it appeared to be nothing more than a tragic accident.  Rocco Ramenstein, the youngest sheep in the Ramenstein family, was in the wrong place at the wrong time.  He was alone in an isolated part of the forest, in the middle of the night, when a tree   limb snapped off and crushed poor Rocco.      

It was ruled an accident. The human police were never called.    

But Rocco’s mother, Felicia, wasn’t satisfied. She knew there was more to it and needed answers.           

So she called on the only one she knew could help, the world renown feline detective, Tabitha Cato.

“Thanks for coming,” Felicia bleated in her high-pitched voice.  “Before we get started, would you care for an alfalfa pellet or some oats?”

Tabitha’s stomach did a somersault and she politely declined. The delicacies of the sheep twisted her whiskers.

“I know a lot of our neighbors thought my son was baaad.  I admit that Rocco got into a lot of trouble when he was young, and he got the reputation for being the black, ah, you know, in the flock.” 

Felicia paused, and Tabitha noted a tinge of redness below Felicia’s ears. 

“But a mother knows.  I’m sure Rocco’s death wasn’t an accident.  Will you help me?  Pleeease.”

Tabitha had her own questions about the case and agreed to help Felicia.

One thing that bothered Tabitha was the time of death.  Why would Rocco be in a remote part of the forest at midnight?   And why would a tree branch suddenly break off on a serene night?

As Tabitha inspected the location of Rocco’s death, she noted the sturdiness of the tree that the branch fell from and the precise cuts in the surrounding trees.   That could only be the work of the Beaver family.

She immediately called for an appointment.  She thought it would be hard to schedule an appointment with Justin, as she had heard he was a workaholic, so she was surprised when he invited her over that very afternoon.  

She hired a tender to take her to the Beaver’s lodge, and she was relieved to see Justin standing on the roof to greet her.  She hated getting wet and was pleased to see Justin had a trap door on his roof to welcome non-aquatic guests.

As she scurried down the steps, Tabitha wrinkled her nose as she was greeted by a strong musky scent.  The floor was damp, and she spryly hopped onto the couch before her paws got damp.  Justin, after settling into his easy chair, picked up his guitar and strummed a few cords. Tabitha hoped he wasn’t about to play a song.

“How can I help you, Tabitha?”

“I’m investigating Rocco’s death, and I noticed some cut marks that look suspiciously like your work.  Were you doing any logging in the area Justin?”

Justin sighed.  “Yes, but that was a long time ago, I’m out of the lumber business now.”

Just then Justin’s wife, Sigourney Beaver entered the room.  “I’m afraid that’s true.  Since Justin’s chain of rest stops took off, I haven’t been able to get him to do a lick of work.”

“Now come on honey, I buy you nice things. Like the bracelet I gave you for our anniversary.”

Sigourney paused and smiled.  “’Yes, that was quite romantic.”  She held it out for Tabitha to examine.  “I’m not used to wearing bracelets, and at first it felt alien on my arm, but I soon grew to love it.  Justin even found some stones from the pond where we had our first date.”  She smiled contentedly, and then continued in a softer voice, “but I do wish you’d fix the leak in the wall.”  She pointed to a loose spot in the branches where water dripped in.

“I’ll call someone tomorrow.  I’m going to watch the Oregon State game now.”

“I just have one more question,” Tabitha stated.  “Where were you on the night of Rocco’s death.”

A smile immediately graced their faces. 

“That’s easy,” Justin smiled.  “We were binge watching our favorite show, Beaverton.”

“Yes,” Sigourney cooed, “Oh, to live the life of a royal.”

Satisfied that the Beavers weren’t involved, Tabitha scrambled off their lodge and took her tender back to shore.

Thinking back to her investigation of the potential crime scene, Tabitha remembered detecting the faint smell of rotten eggs and burnt rubber with her sensitive nose.  That meant that Stinky Le Pew had been in the area. 

Bright and early the next morning, Tabitha stood at the entrance to Stinky’s den.  Le Pew stepped aside to let her in, and Tabitha was immediately overwhelmed by the horrible stench.  Her stomach flipped, and she lost her breakfast.  At least she managed to avoid throwing up on the carpet.

“Really Stinky, it’s only 9 am.”

The skunk lowered his head, and she saw red creeping down the white stripe on his back.  “Sorry, I…I had a nightmare.”

Fortunately, Tabitha was prepared.  She took a bottle of air freshener out of her purse and liberally sprayed the den.  Satisfied that she could finally breathe, Tabitha got down to business.  

“You were in the area where Rocco died, weren’t you.”

Stinky nodded.  He knew better than to lie to Tabitha. She always rooted out the truth.

“Tell me what happened,” Tabitha said.

Le Pew lowered his head, and the redness extended further down his stripe.  “It was an accident. It was my birthday, and some of my friends decided to throw me a party, and it didn’t go well.”  He paused and continued softly, “In my defense, I’ve told them I don’t like to be surprised, but they never listen.”

They sat in silence for a moment.

“You can check with my friends, Peter, Paddy, Bumper, they all were there.  But if you want to know the truth of what went down, I’d talk to Mindy Bear.”

Tabitha’s ears pointed straight ahead and her mouth opened slightly.  “Who?” 

“She’s new to the area.  But Mindy used to live in Brownstone National Park, and she can tell you a few tales.”

Tabitha’s tail shot up and she blinked.  She knew Brownstone Park was a hotbed of crime; this could prove interesting.

After checking with Stinky’s friends, they all confirmed the unfortunate incident, although none of them admitted their intention of making it a surprise party.

Tabitha invited the mysterious Mindy to tea, where they were joined by her bear friend Winston LePooh.  The tea arrived, and Winston began spooning honey into his cup.  On his second scoop, the tablespoon slipped out of his paw and the honey dribbled down the side of the teacup.

“Oh bother,” Le Pooh said as he quickly cleaned up the mess.

Tabitha was surprised when he scooped a third tablespoon into his tea, and her stomach turned when he added a fourth.

“Are you sure you have enough honey?”  Tabitha asked.

Winston appeared to take the question seriously, as he eyed the honey container.  Then he put the tablespoon down, picked up his cup and took a sip.  “No, it’s perfect.”

Tabitha rolled her eyes and got down to business.

“Mindy, I understand you used to live in Brownstone National Park.”

Mindy rolled her eyes.  “Unfortunately, that’s true, I used to date Jobi Bear.”

“The mobster?” Tabitha’s brows arched.

“He wasn’t bad at first, he was actually quite sweet,” Mindy replied.  “He used to take me on romantic dates.  Jobi would bring an incredible spread of food.  He’d have a banquet with all the latest delicacies, just for me.”  She sighed.  “But that’s before I knew the truth.”

When Mindy didn’t continue, Tabitha swished her tail.  This was taking a while.  “Knew what?” she prompted.

Mindy wrinkled her nose.  “That it was all stolen goods.  People were going hungry while we had more food than we could possibly eat.”

She looked down, then squeezed her paws together as she looked at Tabitha.  “But that wasn’t all Jobi was up to.  It started off with small things; Jobi would steal a picnic basket here or there for our dates.  But then things got worse.  He got into racketeering, protection scams, even drug running.  I tried to talk him out of it, to go clean, but he wouldn’t listen.  Finally, I left.”

She turned and looked at Winston.  “And I’m glad I did, or I never would have met my honey bear.”

Winston blushed.

“Do you think Jobi might have had anything to do with Rocco’s death?”

Mindy shrugged.  “I don’t know.  But if you want to find out, there are cameras in the area where Rocco was killed.”

Tabitha’s eyes widened and she leaned forward.  “Really?”

“Yeah, I think they were planted by the rangers to spy on the animals.   You know, what time of season do most animals hook up, who’s dating who, what the latest trends are in the forest, or to see who the troublemakers are when parties get too rowdy, things like that.  I think Ranger Rick even had a gossip column online based on the camera findings, and Poop Dog made a video Animals Gone Wild.”

Tabitha smirked and shook her head slightly.  She was sure that was not what the cameras were for.

“After the federal cutbacks no one watches the cameras anymore, but they still work.”

“So, how could I get access to these cameras?”

“Stop by and see Bo Bo Bear, he’ll know how to access it.”

“You mean Jobi’s lackey?  Why would he help me?”

Mindy smiled.  “He’s smarter than he looks.  He helped me get away from Jobi.”

Two days later, Tabitha traveled to Brownstone National Park.  As she sat in the office, she saw the infamous Jobi Bear himself.        

Jobi glanced at Tabitha as she sat in the waiting room and immediately dismissed her. He turned his attention to Bo Bo.

“Remember my little sidekick, we’ve got a big shipment coming in tonight, so no more screw ups, right?”

“Yes, Jobi,” Bo Bo replied meekly, his eyes on the ground.  “I’ll take care of it.”

“Make sure you do!  Ranger Jones has no idea what’s going on…that’s because I’m smarter than the average…”

“I’ve heard that a hundred times” Bo Bo muttered under his breath so softly only Tabitha’s keen ears were able to pick it up.  “More like smaller than the average bear.”

After Jobi bounced out of the room, Tabitha questioned Bo Bo.

“What was that?” Tabitha asked.

“Ah, nothing, just thinking about something Mindy said.” 

He rubbed his paws together and bounced on his toes.  “So, I understand you want to watch some park videos, correct?”

Tabitha was amazed at the change in Bo Bo.  He had seemed half asleep when Jobi was here, but now he was not only fully awake but energized as well.

“Yes, do you have any footage of the area where Rocco died?” Tabitha said replying to Bo Bo’s question.

“I sure do,” Bo Bo’s voice went up an octave.

He skipped ahead to the office and began clicking away at his computer.  Tabitha pulled up a chair next to him. 

“Ranger Jones showed me how to access the cameras, but I haven’t looked at them in a while.” 

Tabitha frowned.  Why would the ranger do that?

Bo Bo began to hum as his paws flew over the keyboard.  “Ahh, here it is.”

The small bear turned the screen, so Tabitha could get a better view.  The camera showed Rocco walking tentatively along the path in the dark.   

“Is anyone there?  I can’t seeee,” Rocco’s voice was annoyingly shrill coming through the tiny screen’s speakers.

At first there was silence, then they heard a familiar voice.  “I hear you’ve been cheating me, Mr. Ramenstein, cutting the product by mixing regular grass in with the loco weed.”

Rocco’s bleet was even higher than normal.  “Noooo, I’d never do that, let me explain.”

“My customers aren’t happy, so I’m cutting you out of the deal.”

A moment later they heard the snap of a tree branch, and Rocco lay dead on the ground.

Tabitha and Bo Bo stared at the monitor in silence.

“So, Felica was right,” Tabitha said softly.  “It was murder.”

Bo Bo turned to Tabitha.  “Thank you for bringing this to my attention.  Sheriff Jones and I have been working together for a while to take Jobi down.  I knew he was bad, but I never thought he’d go as far as murder!  Thanks to you we now have evidence to put Jobi away for a long time.”

Tabitha gave Felicia the news.  It didn’t take away the sting of losing one of her lambs, but at least she would have the satisfaction of knowing his killer would be punished.

Tabitha pulled out her phone, pulled up her contact list and tapped Rabbit.  “Hey Jess, I just finished a tough case, karaoke tonight?”

Two hours and several catnip shooters later, Tabitha and Jessica strolled on stage prepared to sing their best version ever of Stray Cat Strut.